Finding time for yourself once you become a mom is so hard. It feels like we are always needed somewhere and eventually we reach our breaking point.
It can be draining and exhausting, so it’s SO important that we take care of ourself. We need some intentional self care, some alone time and something to help us remember who we are outside of being a mom.
Unfortunately, it can be really difficult to find a few quiet minutes to ourselves, let alone a couple hours. We’re with the kids all day and then we have dinner and bed time. Then, your significant other is probably wanting your time and company.
Over the past couple of years with my son, I’ve learned to really appreciate the time I get to myself and try to get a break as often as possible.
Having alone time as a mom helps us to stay mentally sane and in turn helps us to be better moms and spouses. So… I’ve put together 10 ideas of affordable ways to find time for yourself as a mom.
Every situation, work schedule and pool of options is different, so it’s hard to find a one size fits all solution when it comes to finding alone time.
Read through all of my top recommendations and ideas and then brainstorm what you may be able to apply or adjust to fit your life.
How to Find Alone Time as a Mom:
1. Wake up before the kids.
This is someone that I aspire to be. In order to do that, I definitely need to fix my schedule and get to bed earlier. But, this sounds so peaceful and nice.
Wake up before your kids and get in some extra time for a workout, journaling, meditating, showering and feeling put-together or just enjoying your morning tea or coffee in peace.
This can really set you up for success and help you feel like you’re starting the day off as an organized mom, rather than a frazzled mom.
2. Swap kids with a friend.
Maybe every Monday, you can have a friend bring her kid(s) over for a couple hours in the morning. Then, every Thursday, you can drop your kids off at her house for the same amount of time.
That way, you both a few kid-free hours a week. You can run some errands, schedule appointments, get a pedicure, read a book, or take a nap without kids hanging off of you all the time.
3. Share a babysitter.
If watching your friends’ kids doesn’t sound like something you can handle… Share a babysitter with a friend one day a week or every other week.
Cut down on costs, pick a day that works for both of you and take a break (together or separately).
4. Find a Mother’s Day Out program.
Find an hourly day care or a mom’s day out program. Check local churches, look them up on Google, ask on local mom Facebook groups and talk to your friends with young kids to see what’s available in your area!
5. Set expectations with your spouse.
Let your spouse know that on a specific night of the week, they will be in charge of the dinner, bath and bed routine on their own. Obviously, explain to them why you’re needing this time and that it’s essential for you to get a break.
Then, leave the house! Even if you just take a book and read it in the car parked down the street or lay down on a blanket at a nearby park. If you’re there, you know your kids will find you or your spouse will call you out of your room for something.
6. Give bath time to your spouse.
Make bath time or bed time consistently your spouse’s thing. Let them take the reins, slip out of the room and use the 30 minutes to do something for you. Don’t use it to clean the house, you and your spouse can tackle that together once the kids are down for the night.
7. Take advantage of the weekend.
Have your spouse be in charge of the kids for a couple hours on their day off. Maybe on Saturday mornings, he can take them to the park for a couple hours and you can have the house to yourself. Or, on Sunday evenings, he can take the kids to go visit his parents, etc.
Think creatively. This can be a great opportunity for your spouse to bond with the kids on his own and you can get a break.
8. Ask family for help.
Ask a nearby family member or grandparent if they would like a standing play date with your kid(s), once a week or twice a month, etc. Most grandparents would love the chance to see their grandkids if they live close enough and their schedules allow. Try to make it not overwhelming for them. You can do this by only leaving them for a few hours at a time. Offering to bring snacks, toys or lunch for them, unless they offer otherwise. That way, they don’t feel like it’s a huge burden or aren’t stressed about what they can feed your kids.
9. Join a gym.
Join the YMCA or a gym with childcare. Then, you can have a stress-releasing workout without your kids climbing over you. They get to have fun and make some new friends, and you’re close in case anything happens.
You can even use their showers and bathrooms to get ready for the day while they’re still at the play center. At the YMCA, you can use their WiFi and do other things while your kids are being watched, too!
10. Use nap time for yourself.
Use nap time intentionally. For some, this is the only break you’ll get consistently. You can get a LOT done during that time if you use it intentionally.
If your kids have stopped napping, I would still implement a quiet time alone in their room, where they can read or play quietly.
Recently, I came across a meme that I loved that explained all the reasons why this mom never cleans during nap time. It’s important for your kids to understand all of the time and effort that goes into keeping the house running. You also need a break to yourself and you shouldn’t feel guilty for taking it.
I’d love to know your thoughts and ideas! Have you tried any of these out before? When do you normally find alone time to do your own thing?
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